We may dislike emotions, especially those that make us feel vulnerable and imperfect. We may call them weaknesses, liabilities or flaws. We may strive to ignore them, suppress them or eliminate them. Are these emotions wrong or are they merely used in a wrong way? Our emotions don't make us weak, when we work with them and work on them. Our emotions make us real. Can we use our emotions in a more meaningful way?
Yes. We simply need to develop our emotional intelligence. In layman terms, it refers to our ability to:
- Recognize and understand what we feel and how we react to situations (self-awareness)
- Adapt and behave according to the situation (self-management)
- Control our emotions to act appropriately, commit, follow-through and work towards achieving our goals.
- Respect others’ feelings, understand their emotions, and build effective relationships (empathy)
- Manage social relationships well; relate, lead, handle conflicts with patience and care along with teamwork (social skills)
Why do you need emotional intelligence?
Emotional intelligence will help you sustain a balanced life. It is essential to understand every aspect of life, which is possible through emotional intelligence
1. Physical Health: Emotional intelligence strengthens our ability to look after our body, especially to manage stress, which impacts our overall well-being incredibly. Awareness about our current emotional state guides our reaction/response to situations appropriately thus managing stress levels effectively and maintaining sound health.
2. Mental Well-Being: What is your outlook towards life? Emotional intelligence affects our behavior and attitude towards life. It helps alleviate anxiety, avoid depression and control frequent mood swings. High levels of emotional intelligence develop a positive attitude towards life and helps you live happily.
3. Relationships: Once you understand your emotional state and manage it better, you can participate in effective communication with people. you start understanding others’ feelings which helps build strong relationships. Understanding needs, responses, feelings will help you relate to others amicably and sustain fulfilling relationships always.
4. Conflict Management: While discerning others’ emotions, you learn to empathize with others and understand their perspective. In this way, it is easier to resolve an argument/conflict or nip it in the bud. You will garner effective negotiation skills as now you are able to understand the desires of other people. if you can perceive what people want then it is easier to respond accordingly.
Success: You are self-motivated due to high levels of emotional intelligence which reduces procrastination. It helps you stay focused and boosts your confidence levels. With emotional intelligence, you can develop a strong support network, overcome failures, and become resilient with perseverance. You will delay gratification and focus on efforts to achieve the long-term goal in turn making you successful. There is a change in your outlook towards success and failure when you are emotionally intelligent.
Although, every school has a Counselor, but I feel the impact is not much as it is just a formality. EdSense has an innovative approach towards addressing emotional intelligence. Instead of appointing a counselor, they meet every student. After having a healthy conversation with the student, they list out students who need attention. They track Grit, Sociability, Meta-cognition, growth-mindset, self-efficiency and emotional well-being.
So are you ready to take steps to achieve high levels of EQ?
About our guest author -
An award-winning poet and author, Devika Das has 5 publications under her name. Her recent title ‘The Mind Game’ has received appreciation from India and abroad as well. What began as a hobby at the age of 13, graduated into blogging in 2008 and took shape of Publishing in 2016 when Devika self-published her first book titled ‘7 Vows of Marriage’ on Amazon Kindle. Her poetry book titled ‘Reminiscence’ has received critical acclaim and her poems have been published in national dailies and featured in anthologies too. She has participated in key literary events at Hyderabad and around India as well. Besides writing, Devika pursues her passion for Acting and is an active theatre artiste in Hyderabad and has featured in several short films.